You Are Not Alone With Debbie & Greg Gold
As a mother and son team, Debbie and Greg come together to talk about the realities and struggles we all face in today’s world. They cover a wide array of topics from mental well being to current events to teachings that will lead you to a relationship with Jesus Christ. As Christians, they know there is one thing that brings peace, hope, and encouragement to anything life throws our way, and that is a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. You don't know what you don't know, so come along on the ride. Your life and heart will be changed forever!
You Are Not Alone With Debbie & Greg Gold
Finding Momentum When You're Feeling Stuck
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Have you ever felt like you're spinning your wheels, stuck in the same place, making no progress? We've been in that rut and it's a tough one. On this episode of You Are Not Alone, we open up about some of our personal trials and struggles. I, Debbie, let you in on my own stalled efforts with a rental property, while Greg shares how he’s been wrestling with his own stagnation. And though the sweltering summer heat and shaky economy haven’t been helping, we want to remind you, and ourselves, that it's normal to have these moments of status-quo.
But here's the thing - even in these moments, there's a silver lining. We take you on a journey, exploring how God uses these hard times to refine us, to mold our character, and deepen our faith. We also talk about these valuable, albeit tough, life lessons that we can glean from our trials. As we learn from a donkey's inspiring story, it's imperative to remember that even in our most challenging times, we have the capacity to overcome and rebound stronger. The key is not to isolate ourselves but to reach out and help others, as we also seek support. After all, we're all in this together, and you are never alone. Tune in, and let’s find our way out of that rut, together.
Feeling Stuck and Unmotivated
Speaker 1Hello and welcome to another episode of the you Are Not Alone podcast. My name is Debbie Gold and I'm here with my co-host and son, greg. We are so glad that you're here with us. Each week on this show, we will talk about informative issues, issues that will make you think and help you grow. It is our wish that you will find hope, encouragement and a little bit of Jesus in every episode. Hey there, welcome back to the you Are Not Alone podcast. I'm here with Greg, hello, hey, hey, it's Debbie, and yeah, it's Friday afternoon and we are ready for the weekend. I don't know about you, but I have had a very productive, long go non-stop week.
Speaker 2Yeah, long week would be the description for me too.
Speaker 1I think yeah, alright so, anyway, we want to talk about being stuck. Greg and I were chatting about it and we both have been feeling that way, like we've been stuck, there's no movement in our life. I mean, even though I'm busy, busy, busy, I just feel like there's so many things that I'm kind of hung up on and stuck. Like one of my situations, greg, is the rental house that we have that.
Speaker 1I put all that work in in September, like I spent 24-7 there and felt like furnishing it, cleaning it, doing all these fun things, but yet tiring and wearing things after a while.
Speaker 2You were working, working. You would wake up seven in the morning and I'd wake up like eight and you'd already be gone over there. You'd get home around four. Sometimes like that, it was a productive day and you'd just be working your butt off, and sometimes even later, sometimes even later.
Speaker 1And I was thinking today. I was like, why didn't I just sleep there? Because I got the beds moved in right.
Speaker 2It's so nice there.
Speaker 1Why didn't I just stay there and get the rest of my stuff done? I kept going back and forth, but anyways, whatever, yeah, so I feel like, okay, I worked so hard in September to get that done and I put it out on my different websites, my different apps and sites for rent, and that was October 2nd and I still haven't rented it.
Speaker 1And so I'm just going oh my gosh, when am I going to get somebody? I put a lot of energy and time and money into this and I'm getting responses, but they're not working out Right, For whatever reason. I wouldn't.
Speaker 2I don't know. You put so much effort into the house and I've spent the night there a couple times and it is amazing, yeah, so it's like when people see the potential of this place, they're going to just flock to it, yeah, so yeah, it's going to work out.
Speaker 1And when I think about it, what it's been 18, 17 days since it's really been on the market. That's not bad, that's not long at all. So, but then and then, on top of that, it was the summer heat that had been going on. For we're finally getting a little relief right now, it's so nice, but it was all summer and Tell me about it. I mean, I was just like, is this ever going to end? And it's 100 degrees every single day or more, and it's just, it wears you out.
Speaker 2It does.
Speaker 1It just it sucks you dry. Yeah, it sucks the energy out of you.
Speaker 2The hot sun and stuff like that. Yeah, it's terrible so.
Speaker 1And then we're trying to get a vehicle for Chase and we're trying to find the right one that's in our budget that is gonna last him through college has low mileage, and the first one was a dud. A dud. We blew that. We don't wanna talk about that one. Let's put that behind us.
Speaker 2That's right. It's in the past.
Speaker 1We're not going there. It just feels like there's so much weighing and I feel so stuck on all these things and I just really want some movement and I wanna go forward and I think the economy doesn't add to that, or adds to that as well. It's like the economy's bad. Do you get concerned about spending money? Yeah, dad and I talk about selling our house and moving somewhere, getting a house somewhere else, and you're scared to do that because you don't know what's gonna happen.
Speaker 1Well, the market's down right now. You really can't sell anything and getting money for it, and you know. And then try to find a different. You know it's just a bad time all over economically and it's a time where you don't really wanna do those kind of big things because it's uncertain, it's maybe not the wisest thing to do. So yeah, I've been feeling stuck, feeling like there's no movement. I think that's a really good way to say it.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1I don't feel like my life is progressing. I have feeling stuck. There we go.
Speaker 2Yeah, that's pretty relatable. Not moving, just yeah.
Speaker 1For me it's a little different.
Speaker 2I lose motivation a lot. I lose energy as well, I think, but overall motivation's the main thing for me when I feel stuck, I think.
Speaker 1So, cause.
Speaker 2I mean, you're just like we were talking earlier.
Speaker 1You said you're in this pit, you know you were saying and I was like yeah, I mean the pit of the stuck. Yeah, it's like you can't get out the pittiest of the stuck. Yeah, it's like you're in this deep hole and you're trying to get out. So in this pit, yeah, it's a bad feeling.
Speaker 2So.
Speaker 1Duck pit yeah. Not good.
Speaker 2Not a good feeling, no.
Speaker 1So you're feeling unmotivated.
Speaker 2Yeah, I think I am for sure.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2Think about it, yeah so, but I'm taking steps to like get out of the stuckness you know, and it's helping. So, like I, you know the gym recently.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2And that has just been tremendous.
Speaker 1so yeah, that's awesome. I'm glad you got back into that.
Speaker 2Getting a routine is so helpful for me.
Speaker 1So, and so you started. What was it Tuesday? I think yeah, tuesday. You went Tuesday, wednesday, thursday. I took a free day yesterday. I didn't go yesterday, you took your free day today, which is Friday, and when I was at the gym the trainer said Greg's been coming every day and I go. Yes, he has, it's so wonderful. And he took a free day today.
Speaker 2Or off day, yeah.
Speaker 1Or off day. And Eric said that's okay, yeah, you gotta have an off day, yeah, so Anyway, but I'm proud of you for that. Getting back into that I know it was important to you when you were Last year at college and yeah, I want to get back into that shape way better too, because I've gained so much strength from you know summer landscaping and all that too, so I can just add the strength and the work ethic, I'll get there.
Speaker 2Yeah, helps with motivation too, which is what I need right now.
Speaker 1Mm-hmm, totally does.
Speaker 2Yeah. I think it gives you more energy to it does you're pushing yourself and stuff, yeah, setting your goals, stuff like that.
Speaker 1So feeling good about yourself all those things. Yeah, there's so much that can come out of that, for sure.
Speaker 2Love it.
Overcoming Challenges and Finding Strength
Speaker 1So, yeah, stuck. I think one of the big Things that I was reminded of this week and doing my, my studies and my time with with God is that you know, god uses the difficult times in our lives to to build our faith with him, but also to develop our character and to make us stronger. And and I know that I, because I've been through difficult times before we all have them and we always will. But to keep in mind those things, that if I stick to it, if I head down, then I know that I'm gonna become a better person and I'm going to become a stronger person because of it and I'm gonna learn from it.
Speaker 2Yeah, there's this saying it's like tough times, great tough men, you know. Yeah, cuz I mean people go through hardships and stuff you know. You can realize that there could be, you know, almost a lesson, and sometimes tragedies and stuff like that. You can learn something, maybe something about yourself, or you can take away a lot. It just depends on how you look at it. I think so.
Speaker 1Absolutely. I totally agree with that. And look and that kind of leads me to so how you, how you respond to your difficulties, has everything to do with what your next steps are gonna be in your life. So you know, you can choose to go for me poor me, oh my gosh, what am I gonna do, right? Which we talked about a couple weeks ago. Or you can go okay, god's got this, this is me now, and there are some things that I can do that are gonna get me through, and that's kind of what I wanted to share today and for us to have a discussion about. So the first thing about that is to you know, don't give up. You just trust that this, too, is going to pass. This is just a little season in my life right now. There's two shall pass, yeah, and it's a season in my life, it's something that's going on and this is not gonna be me stuck here forever.
Speaker 2Might be difficult, but we'll get there Right excellent.
Speaker 1Excellent thing to say, excellent thing to remember.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1And then the second thing is do what's right, and when I say that, I really am thinking about what can we do that we would normally be doing? So don't get stuck in the self pity, but put your focus on someone else. Help other people.
Speaker 2Try to make someone's day something like that.
Speaker 1Make someone's day. Go help someone out, go volunteer, do whatever. Yeah, keep your focus on your relationship with God and just trust where you are right now. Just know that this is where I'm supposed to be Hardest thing to do ever, because you're like why me?
Speaker 2Yeah, I wanna go back to that one point where you're like helping other people out and stuff like that. It like when you help somebody, like, let's say, I give this guy on the side of the street, you know, some food and stuff like that, I feel better about myself afterwards knowing that I helped them out in times of need and stuff like that. And it just it raises your attitude, I think, for however long it does so, it helps me. So just doing good things.
Speaker 1It makes you feel better Makes you feel better. I feel good. Yeah, just feel good and that's gotta add to takes your mind off that other stuff that baggage that's hanging there. Yeah, so we got you know. Never give up, Know that this is gonna pass. Second, let's do what's right. Let's focus on others and trust where we're at. The third thing is don't isolate yourself. Oh gosh, this is huge. You gotta reach out to people, Cause if you isolate, what are you gonna do, Greg? What do you think?
Speaker 2Overthink and just moan and ee just be all sad For me you're gonna stay in that little pit. Right.
Speaker 1That pit of stuck.
Speaker 2That's not a fun pit.
Speaker 1Right, we don't wanna be in that pit, you know, I know. Just for example, yesterday I went and had my hair done and get my color and all that and not that I wouldn't do that anyway, but it's a good example. I was sharing with my Katrina the lady that does my hair about something going on in my life and she's always got really good advice. You know, advice or insight into things.
Speaker 2I say you were gone for a decent while. I was wondering if you were chatting it up, yeah yeah, it was longer than usual.
Speaker 1Yeah, I could tell. But anyways, it was really good that I didn't isolate what was going on inside of me and I shared something with her and she gave me some insight into something. I don't wanna get into detail, but just gave me a different. She gave me her perspective on the situation when I was kinda making my mind up and going in one direction, getting a different perspective is so good.
Speaker 2Cause sometimes in your own perspective. You overthink things you know with like worry or stuff like that, yeah, so, yeah, yeah, getting a fresh idea from, yes, a different perspective is so, so important.
Speaker 1So, anyway, don't isolate yourself. Tell people what's going on with you, right? I think it's very important to do that.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1And you might be surprised what people say and what rings true for you and could impact you in a way you never thought possible.
Speaker 2I always like to get like a different perspective on it too, cause I mean, a different mindset is better and if you're in like a negative mindset, let's say, someone with like a neutral mindset can just like see the situation clearly and you know, understand what's happening. So I think it's really important to talk to other people. Stuff like that with problems and stuff.
Speaker 1Yeah. So, speaking of not isolating yourself or reaching out to people, I have another example I wanna share in my life. So, with all this going on it was couple of weeks ago I reached out to the supper club group oh, yeah, my ladies right. And I just asked them to pray for me. And here's just some of the responses. I'm just gonna read some of the things that they said that stuck out to me. I know God will provide a way. It's going to work out.
Speaker 1We love you guys. Stay strong and keep the faith.
Speaker 2Yeah, support a friend group right there.
Speaker 1I know, isn't that wonderful? Yeah, so that's what you can get by reaching out. That was so uplifting to me and it gave me hope that I just need to keep my head down, stay in my faith and this is all going to work out over time.
Speaker 2That's why I like surrounding yourself with positive people is so important. Yeah, you don't want to be with those people that are always negative and Nancy and stuff like that, because they'll just drag you down to their level.
Speaker 1Mm-hmm, that's true.
Speaker 2And you'll develop the same mindset that they did, you know.
Speaker 1Yeah, then you get going on that. So finding having people in your lives that can be good support people for you.
Speaker 2Mm-hmm. Yeah, and people that like, tell it how it is. You know, honestly, I hate people that snowflake stuff. You know, they hide the truth from you and they tell you at the software.
Speaker 1It's like I want to know what happened and how it happened.
Speaker 2I don't want to beat around the bush.
Speaker 1Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 2That can mess up somebody's feelings, or you know what they're thinking, or you know anything, mm-hmm.
Speaker 1Just be a. You want the truth, yeah.
Speaker 2The truth and only the truth, and the out front truth.
Speaker 1Mm-hmm.
Speaker 2It's good for helping people because they can think clearly about it.
Speaker 1So Right, okay. So then the fourth thing, after you don't isolate yourself is just don't stop believing. Just know that this is going to improve the time. You know that's putting your faith in God, or you know. However, just know that it's going to improve and you are not going to be stuck here forever. And sometimes I have to look back and go. I remember that time when it was really really hard, but I got through that.
Speaker 2Mm-hmm, and looking me now, and looking me now.
Speaker 1Yes, I'm good and I'm better because of it.
Speaker 2Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1So I know that this too is going to pass. This too shall pass, as they say.
Speaker 2I feel like taking your mind off, like, let's say, you have a lot of stuff on your plate like you do right, taking your mind off like all the other stuff that you have to do, like the Shenandoah house, you know, getting a car, yada, yada, yada, all that other stuff and just focusing on the small things in life, it helps so much with your mindset and attitude. I think.
Speaker 1So like an example of a small thing, like for me, maybe Going outside and sitting on the front porch.
Speaker 2It is so nice.
Speaker 1I know right, it's a beautiful day, Right.
Speaker 2And just you come out and you're like it's a good day, Smile on your face.
Speaker 1It's all going to be all right, yeah.
Speaker 2Just like smoke is focusing on the smaller things.
Speaker 1Right, right, those little things, they matter, just breathing.
Speaker 2Yeah, you're lucky to be alive.
Speaker 1Right, Just going. Okay, slow down and breathe.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1You know, or go sit on the front porch when the weather is beautiful.
Speaker 2Take a minute, yeah, yeah, and I think I talked to. I'm blind a little bit, or something, right?
Speaker 1I talked about that last time where I hadn't been in my quiet time with the Lord every morning in September because I was so focused on Shenandoah and getting that furnished and ready to rent again and like I totally missed the most important thing in my life for like a whole month. Isn't that not how you just keep up and get going. You get distracted.
Speaker 2Yeah, you get distracted and your priorities change.
Speaker 1So yeah, so anyway, don't stop believing.
Speaker 2It's all going to work out. It always does.
Getting Unstuck
Speaker 1And then finally move, take a step, whatever that is. And I want to read something to you because I love this little story. It's a little story, it's about a donkey, and I Get this story from Joyce Myers, who's a Christian author and speaker, and she's she doesn't know this, but she's been my mentor for probably 20 years. Like love this lady.
Speaker 2And face her own, our house, since I can remember, yeah, in the mail and the Anyway, she's amazing, she's got podcasts and TV shows. I looked her up to see if like. How, how authentic is this, joyce Mars? I looked her up for my own.
Speaker 1And she's a nonprofit and I was like, yeah, wow, okay.
Speaker 2That's great.
Speaker 1She's got ministries all over the world. Yeah where she she.
Speaker 2You know, helps young people To the Lord and stuff like that kids with clipped lips.
Speaker 1They get surgery, they dig wells, they do I mean, they just do all this crazy stuff trafficking, help when we get out of trafficking, and she's all over the place. It's crazy, and she's got her whole family involved in this ministry pretty cool, yeah, so all our kids got four kids, I believe and she's a lot yeah, so anyway.
Speaker 1So I love Joyce Myers and she tells the story and I've heard it different times, and here here it goes. You may have heard the story about a donkey that fell into a well. Upon seeing what happened, his owner thought about it for a while and then he decided the pit was too deep and the donkey was too old, so he decided to bury him in the well. He called some friends and neighbors to help and they began to shovel dirt into the pit. At first the donkey cried out, obviously terrified of the situation.
Speaker 1Later, however, his owner noticed that he'd gotten quiet. He'd gotten quiet and thought he'd probably already had died. But the donkey had not died. And when the owner looked down in the pit, he saw that every time the dirt fell on its back, the donkey would shake it off I and step on it, packing it down under his hooves. This continued for hours until finally the donkey had packed enough dirt to lift himself up and out of the pit. Okay, like I said, I've heard this story so many times and I love it and I'm always reminded of I have to move.
Speaker 2That little donkey's got some stamina.
Speaker 1No kidding, right Like he didn't give up.
Speaker 2Well, he thought about a way to get out of it yeah smart donkey.
Speaker 1So I don't want to be the donkey in the pit, I want to be on the way out of the pit. Exactly. I want to be on the move, yeah, and I want to take steps that might lead me to getting unstuck. So I'm not going to stand still, be in the pit. I'm going to take steps to get unstuck. So I think that's.
Speaker 2The donkey thought about the solutions and made it happen.
Speaker 1Absolutely.
Speaker 2I didn't even know that story. That's pretty cool.
Speaker 1Isn't that cool. Yeah, that's kind of what you're doing with your working out, getting back at the gym. You're not letting yourself be stuck.
Speaker 2Yeah, I'm just stepping on the sand now.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2Trying to get unstuck. So it's working. Yeah, it's helping Absolutely.
Speaker 1So yeah, whether we're stuck in our relationships or our finances, or our health or whatever it happens to be, we just got to keep moving.
Speaker 2Always.
Speaker 1Find a way.
Speaker 2Just keep moving, just keep swimming, just do it.
Speaker 1You know it's going to either help or it's not, but you just got to keep at something.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1Keep moving forward.
Speaker 2Like Dora said, finding Nemo just keeps swimming.
Speaker 1Is that what she said? How do you not know? I don't know Too many of those movies back then, oh, my gosh.
Speaker 2So many different Disney and Pixar movies. It's crazy.
Speaker 1Yeah, Anyway. So I don't know if I have anything else to share today. How about you?
Speaker 2I think I discussed everything.
Speaker 1Okay, I think we're all ready to share. All right, I like that I like that donkey store. That was pretty good, that is so awesome. I was like, where are?
Speaker 2you going with this, you know, and then I was like the donkey's dead.
Speaker 1No, no, the doggie didn't die, that's pretty cruel.
Speaker 2You see the old donkey in there. And then the donkey figured the way out. I was like, so you?
Speaker 1know. And doggies, they're not smart, right Not?
Speaker 2really no so that's pretty impressive.
Speaker 1But when there's a will, there's a way. So there you go, exactly yeah.
Speaker 2I love that saying yeah.
Speaker 1All right, so call to action. So I think, gosh, I don't know, see if there's a place that you're stuck in your lives.
Speaker 2Try to think about it and digest where you're feeling stuck In the stuck pit.
Speaker 1Yeah, where are you in a pit somewhere?
Speaker 2Are you in the stuck pit?
Speaker 1Is it a relationship pit or is?
Speaker 2it a relationship, my finance, kids right. Bigger problems, smaller problems, job, I don't know. It could be anything.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah, for sure, anything. So identify that and then try to keep in mind some of the things that we talked about today.
Speaker 2You know, don't give up and start digging yourself out of that pit.
Speaker 1Dig yourself out, take some steps, do some good for other people, don't isolate yourself and just don't stop believing because it will get better.
Speaker 2Always.
Speaker 1Yeah, all right, I guess that's our wrap for today, and so glad that you're here with us. Thank you for listening and just remember you're not alone. You are not alone, all right. Thank you, jesus.
Speaker 2Thank you, Jesus.
Speaker 1Take care, we'll talk to you all soon.
Speaker 2All right.